


I Will Wait for You

by tylerandburnham



Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:00:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23272117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tylerandburnham/pseuds/tylerandburnham
Summary: Set after the Star Trek: Discovery season 2 finale. Amanda talks to Ash about Michael after watching the Enterprise with Spock and Captain Pike leave space dock.
Relationships: Michael Burnham/Ash Tyler | Voq
Comments: 16
Kudos: 31





	I Will Wait for You

I Will Wait for You

_“So break my step_

_And relent_

_You forgave and I won't forget_

_Know what we've seen_

_And him with less_

_Now in some way_

_Shake the excess_

_'Cause I will wait, I will wait for you_

_And I will wait, I will wait for you_

_And I will wait, I will wait for you_

_And I will wait, I will wait for you_

_Now I'll be bold_

_As well as strong_

_And use my head alongside my heart_

_So take my flesh_

_And fix my eyes_

_A tethered mind free from the lies”_

Mumford and Sons - I Will Wait

  
  


Ash Tyler stood learning at the window watching the Enterprise depart space dock. There was so much he had to do, so many missions, projects, and people clamoring for his attention now that he was Director Tyler. He was still wrapping his mind around that one. How had Starfleet brass EVER thought to make him, a human/klingon hybrid, the director of Section 31? Unique perspective? Sure, but…. 

Moving his thoughts back to the Enterprise’s departure out the open space station doors, Tyler thought of the people he would miss on that ship. Tyler hadn’t trusted Captain Pike at first, nor did Pike trust him at first either But Tyler had grown to respect, admire, and trust Captain Pike. He was glad Spock had such a captain and friend. He wished he had gotten to know Spock better...

Spock. Vulcans were so adept at hiding their emotions, but Tyler could tell as soon as he was back on Enterprise that Spock was as gutted about losing Michael as Tyler was. At least Tyler had known he was saying behind to fight the future. Spock had assumed he was going with his sister 900 plus years into the future only to have it all snatched away when his shuttle was damaged. He couldn’t even imagine what that must have been like. Belay that. Of course he could imagine. There was a brief moment of joy when he too thought he would join Michael in the future via Discovery. And then reality had set in. He was needed here. Michael needed him here. The future needed him here. If there was one thing that Tyler was eternally grateful for was that he now knew, without a doubt, that Michael had forgiven him, that Michael loved him...

Looking up he watched the Enterprise finish going through the hanger doors and warp to her next mission. He gave a small sigh, grateful he had found this secluded spot away from the crowds of well wishers eager to watch the departure.

“An isik for your thoughts?"

Tyler’s mind snapped out of his thoughts and he straightened up quickly. He swiveled to see who had spoken and his breath caught in his throat.

“Mrs. Grayson, um.., Ms. Grayson, um…, Mrs. Sarek...” Tyler literally had no idea how to address her or what to call her. He had always just thought of her as Michael’s mother but had never actually been introduced to her. 

She smiled and shook her head in amusement at Tyler’s verbal difficulties.. “Amanda, please.” 

Giving a brief and somewhat nervous smile in return, Tyler cleared his throat. Nodding his head toward the spot where the space station doors had closed he said, “It must be difficult. Saying good-bye to Spock so soon after…”

Amanda’s face froze for a moment and she looked around noting the secluded spot again, that no one was near. Turning back to face Tyler she said, “Yes. And there are so few people I can say her name to now. So few people,” tears sprang into her eyes as she blinked them back, “who can understand my grief.”

His eyes filling with tears mirroring her own, Tyler took a steading breath before saying, part whisper, part prayer, “Michael.”

“Michael,” Amanda whispered in reply. 

Attempting to keep the sadness from overwhelming her, Amanda crossed her arms and smiled. Forcing a lightness in her tone she said, “My daughter, Michael, kept her feelings close to her. A consequence of a human child being raised on Vulcan perhaps despite my best attempts. But I could see on Discovery that more and more she was embracing her humanity and her feelings, which made my own heart glad.” There was a pause and Amanda gazed at him searching for answers that Tyler didn’t know the questions to. ”Which is why I wish my daughter had told me more about you and about your relationship to her. And my husband I might add, who kept this from me. He said it was “logical” to wait and let Michael tell me about you when she felt ready. I’ve made sure that he now knows to _always_ tell me anything he knows about our children whether he feels it logical or not to tell me.”

Tyler looked down for a few seconds totally unsure how to respond. If Michael hadn’t told her mother about him, how should he begin? What should he say? Would she think he didn’t deserve her? He didn’t and yet he was always trying to... He looked up tilting his head slightly. He crossed his arms and opened his mouth to say something, anything.

Sensing his discomfort, Amanda smiled and reached out putting a comforting hand on Tyler’s crossed arms. “When my husband and I said...good-bye to Michael, she asked me to contact you after she had gone. She asked me to look after you to make sure that you never got stuck. She wanted me to tell you that if you ever got stuck… She wanted you to know that you could reach out to me, that I could help you get unstuck. I hope that makes sense. She said you were family to her.”

Underneath Amanda’s hand she could feel Tyler trembling, his eyes trying to blink back tears. His one arm moved out of Amanda’s grasp so that he could discretely try to rub away the tears that slipped through. His hand continued running down his face and beard giving himself a few moments to try to regain some control over his emotions. He cleared his throat in an attempt to steady his voice and said, “That was kind of her.”

When Tyler finally got his eyes to meet Amanda’s gaze he knew she knew.

Amanda said quietly, her voice full of emotion, “It was more than kindness, wasn’t it? She loves you.”

Tyler nodded. “And I love her.”

Reaching up to him, Tyler bent down and let her wrap her arms around his neck. Tyler returned her hug. Amanda said, “I didn’t understand why Michael said she wouldn’t be able to say good-bye to you even though you were on the ship. She told me to tell you that she was very sorry and that she would miss you...always. She said you had been a tether for her” It was then Amanda felt tears dampening her shoulder.

Releasing him after a few moments, Tyler stood up and said shakily, “She has always been my tether too.”

Full of sorrow, Amanda said, “And to not have had a chance to say good-bye.”

A bittersweet smile came over Tyler’s face. “We were never great at good-byes. But we did have a moment...a short moment.” Amanda could see Tyler’s internal gaze leave her and travel back to a past memory of Michael of which she could not share. Tyler was always moving forward, he had to, but he knew a part of him would always exist at that exact last moment and all the moments with Michael that preceded it. A part of him existed where his lips kissed hers as his hands touched her face. It was where his arms held her one last time around her waist. It was the moment where their hearts healed and broke and then fused together despite the broken places.

Shrugging and smiling despite the tears in his eyes, Tyler spoke L’Rell’s truth, “I have been and will always be in love with Michael Burnham. I knew she knew how I felt, that my feelings hadn’t changed. I would always watch out for her and protect her. But I wasn’t sure how she felt after everything we had been through, after everything I had done. I thought she might be able to but I wasn’t sure… But in the end that I knew for sure.”

Solemnly, Amanda said, “I know she would have chosen a different path if there was any other way. But the needs of the many…”

“Outweigh the needs of the few. Or the one,” finished Tyler sorrowfully. “I wish I could have gone with her. But someone had to stay. I just thought I could protect her better here. To make sure nothing like the AI happened to Section 31 again.”

Amanda nodded. What could she say to fill the void Michael’s hole had left in both their lives? She reached out for Tyler’s hand and clasped it between her two hands. She gave it a squeeze. “I am so proud of her though. And proud so many of the Discovery crew loved her enough and believed in her enough to follow her.”

Tyler smiled and squeezed her hand back. “She couldn’t have a better group of friends by her side.They are a family and they won’t let her down. That she won’t be alone...it gives me comfort.”

Suddenly conscious of someone watching them, they looked up to see Sarek waiting nearby.

“Ambassador Sarek,” said Tyler who nodded as he released Amanda’s hand.

Amanda smiled at Sarek who joined them. To Tyler she said, “Ash, if you need us or me or Spock, call. If I don’t hear from you, I will call you. You’ll always have a home with us on Vulcan. Anytime.”

Sarek raised an eyebrow at his wife’s words but didn’t contradict her. He turned to Tyler. “My wife said she wished to speak to you alone. We are in agreement. I wish to add that I told Michael when things were... difficult between you two, that she should never regret loving someone. I am pleased that both she and you were able to resolve your...differences. I am….thankful for you looking out for my daughter, for caring about her.”

“Always.” Tyler could feel his heart overflowing. Even from the future he could feel Michael’s love. If he couldn’t be with her, she had given him her next most precious gift, her family. Her family that took her in and loved her when her biological family had been lost to her. “I can’t tell you how much that means to me.”

“Our transport to Vulcan will be leaving in 16 minutes so we must depart.” Sarek raised his hand in the vulcan salute. “Live long and prosper, Director Tyler.”

Tyler raised his own hand in the same gesture. “”Live long and prosper.”

Both Amanda and Sarek nodded and then turned to leave. Tyler watched them go. Losing Michael was like a wound that would never truly heal. But for the first time since he watched Michael and Discovery go through that wormhole he felt less alone in the universe. Michael was gone but she had given him a gift. The family who found her and took her in when she was lost and alone had now taken him in. “Thank you, Michael, my love,” he whispered into the universe. Their tether hadn’t severed. It had stretched to the breaking point but had never and would never break. 


End file.
